Sometimes I write short stories. This was one I submitted to the Bridport Prize. Unfortunately, I didn’t get selected but now I can share it here. I hope you enjoy it!
"There you are on your board, floating, rocking with each ripple on the surface. Waiting, daydreaming. It must have been a quarter of an hour since the last time you stood up and glided so smoothly. The closest feeling you can get to flying.
Impatience creeps in. Maybe it's time to head back. You had hoped to find something new today, something bigger and more significant than ever before.
Out of nowhere, a massive set of unrideable waves emerges. You asked for bigger, but these angry monsters will allow no one to ride them.
You hesitate for a moment, glancing back towards the shore – safety, stability, the known world. Your gaze returns to the approaching behemoths. They draw nearer. You imagine what may await you on the other side of this set. That inspires you. Joy floods through you as you acknowledge this potential. Today is the day you don't turn back.
You choose to paddle towards them, knowing your wave awaits on the other side. You paddle hard, duck dive beneath them, getting tumbled in the process. Resurfacing again and again, with little time to catch your breath, you paddle harder toward the next one.
Each dive consumes more oxygen. You push your limits. The last wave barrels towards you, and you toss your board behind, throwing your nearly limp body underwater to swim beneath it. After what feels like an eternity, you resurface, gasping for as much oxygen as you can take in.
As suddenly as it came, the closeout set of waves settles back into the ocean, like a child falling asleep after a tantrum. The water returns to complete calm. You mount your board once again, as if stepping onto an Olympic podium, whipped but with a slight grin on your face. You have emerged victorious.
Now, you sit on your board once more. Heavy breaths, arms feeling like they could fall off. Your perspective widens as you gaze into the distant horizon. You can see so far, it seems endless. What lies there is your future, waiting to be birthed. You catch your breath, rest, and prepare yourself for the inevitable.
For now, it is quiet. The water reflects the sunlight like pearls. Enjoy the pause. Don't anticipate the next set, for that would mean missing this moment. Look back at the shore and see how far you have come. Embrace your vulnerability, understanding that you are connected to something greater. Find gratitude, knowing you are in good hands.
The Gods reward you with rest.
Take in the beauty of the water reflecting the sunlight off its glassy, greyish-greenish surface. Let your legs dangle off your board into the sea, fluids inside the body getting to know the ones outside at the meeting point of your skin. Pelicans fly by in single-file formation, swooping low enough to grace the cool surface with their wingtips.
The sun moves closer to the infinite horizon, painting the sky with changing colors. Blues turn to reds, oranges turn to pinks and purples. You look back at the shore and see the abundant plant life climbing up to the distant mountaintops. Rivers pour into the open mouth of the sea.
Not another human in sight. Your soul has the space to expand freely as the only presence here. Expand. It's your second reward from the Gods.
You hear the ocean's changing sound, signaling your third reward approaching. Spotting it in the distance, rolling from right to left, you have no doubt. The dance begins. You and the wave coordinate, finding your positions. Your dance intensifies, growing more passionate and connected. As you turn towards the wave and embrace its call, the two of you unite, finding the perfect spot for takeoff. You've made your choices, and now, as you stand up, something takes over.
Freedom. Your fourth reward…”
A silence followed, filling the air between them.
"Uhhhh... I don't get it, Doc."
"I mean, I understand the story, and it's quite an achievement, but what does it have to do with my situation? You've had me visualize this every day for the past week. It ends with freedom, but I still feel trapped when I return. Is this some kind of riddle?"
"There's nothing to solve. Your answer lies within," the Professor replied, removing his blindfold. Elijah sat up from the couch. "I'm running out of time, Doc. I have to make a decision soon."
"And the more you think about it, the further you'll stray from clarity. Look to the visualization that has become familiar to you by now, Elijah. What do you see? What does it mean to you?"
"Nothing has changed, Doc. You ask me the same question every day, and my answer remains the same."
"The same question doesn't demand the same answer," the Professor replied, transmitting curiosity through his gaze.
They sat in the Professor's "Laboratory of Life," a sunlit cylindrical room with high ceilings shaped like an upside-down cone. Once a cathedral, it had been transformed into a university facility. Large east-facing windows provided a view of the campus gardens, adorned with trimmed hedges, flowers, vines, oak and pine trees, fountains, and well-manicured grass.
The Professor's desk occupied the south side—a modern, L-shaped apparatus with translucent legs that made it look like it was floating. The typical professor's desk. Surrounded by piles of papers, notes, mail, and books, resembling a maze.
The west wall boasted a half-moon-shaped shelf, floor-to-ceiling, filled with books on various subjects. Jung and James; Du Bois, Marx, and Comte; Hayek and Keynes; Kant, Nietzche, Aristotle, Fontaine, and Foucault; Feldenkrais and Rolf; Carver and Franklin; Gandhi, Lao Tzu, and Patanjali; Picasso, Dali, and Warhol.
The Professor had it all. Elijah sat a few steps in front of the shelf facing the windows, on a brown mid-century modern couch long enough to accommodate his lanky frame during the sessions.
Facing Elijah, the Professor settled into a maroon leather rolling chair with silver accents. Between them stood a solid burnt wood Bamileke coffee table, a gift received on a trip to Cameroon. Beneath it lay another gift – a Turkish rug adorned with the typical floral motif and geometric patterns in reds, blues, browns, and golds.
The Professor's room was adorned with diverse artifacts – vintage, contemporary, antique, Baroque, and Bohemian, reflecting the Professor's eclectic nature.
Relaxing into the silence that engulfed the room, the Professor leaned back in his chair, crossing one leg over the other just enough for his argyle socks to peek out from beneath his navy blue slacks. He pushed his round aureate glasses towards the top of his nose and embraced the stillness.
On the other hand, Elijah sat stiff as a statue, burdened by the weight of the decision he was destined to make. The terror reflected in his expression – lost eyes, yearning for the Professor to rescue him from his agony.
"Now, Elijah, I want you to notice how you're sitting at this moment. Don't change anything, just be aware."
Elijah's back was tense and jutting forward, off the couch. His forearms rested on his knees, his chest caved in, and his head protruded forward, held by the hapless tendons in his neck. His heels were lifted off the ground, as if ready to sprint to the door any second.
"What do you feel here?" the Professor asked.
"I feel tight. And terrified of the consequences if I make this decision," Elijah replied.
"Okay... And what might happen if you do?" the Professor continued.
"Well..." Elijah paused. "I might lose everything."
"And how does it feel when you lose everything? What sensations do you experience in your body?" the Professor inquired.
"My heart is racing," Elijah responded.
"My breath is shallow."
"And I can feel a sensation in my stomach, similar to a black hole or a vacuum."
"Good," said the Professor.
"Can you get closer to that black hole? Not just observe it, but start to experience what it
does to you?"
"Yeah," said Elijah. "Somewhat, I guess."
"Now, can you remember the first choice you made in the visualization?" the Professor paused and watched how Elijah received his inquiry.
"Ah, I see!" Elijah exclaimed, nearly jumping out of his seat. "The monstrous waves in
the visualization represents the black hole."
"Yes, exactly," the Professor confirmed. "What did you do to choose to move toward them?"
"I... I kept the possibility that something good was waiting for me on the other side," Elijah replied, newfound awareness in his voice.
The Professor nodded. "So, you see, it's not about eliminating your fear, but bringing it with you toward the new potential."
"Hmmm, surprisingly, I feel less fear now," Elijah said. "My body is trembling less, and I am not as stiff anymore. The black hole doesn't seem so big now. It's in the background of my experience, and I notice silence inside."
"Brilliant," the Professor remarked.
"This must be... This must be the first reward," Elijah said hopefully.
"You're onto something now, Elijah.
You see, sometimes the ocean surprises you, but you always have a choice. You can either retreat toward the familiar shore or open yourself up to the future—something unknown, scary, and potentially fatal.
Those monsters came to take your head off, and there were two ways to perceive that. You could view it through the lens of death or the lens of transformation. After all, you didn't die in the visualization, working your way through those crushing waves, nor did you die when you gave yourself to the black hole.
But if you ask me, when you look at it through death's lens, nine times out of ten, you're runnin’ the other way. Look through the lens of transformation, and you'll see an opportunity. It's a choice in the end. You choose how you see it."
"Ah, and I guess part of me 'dies' when I choose a new option. The habitual reaction falls away," Elijah realized.
"That's right," said the Professor.
"In the visualization, you made the daring choice to move toward the colossal waves, uncertain of emerging on the other side. Within the depths of those waters, beneath the roaring white foam and tumultuous currents, a part of you was lost.
In those moments, all you possessed were your arms, your breath, and trust in the awaiting possibility. Despite the awareness that you could invest everything within you, an unruly and uncontrollable force confronted you. Nonetheless, you willingly threw yourself into its embrace.
You encountered your fragility, recognizing that the only control you possessed was the willingness to accept what is. On the other side, you discovered that you had accomplished something extraordinary – embracing life instead of fleeing from it.
You relinquished your fear of transformation and, therefore, the fear of death. Brief as the moment may have been, you surrendered yourself to the possibility of demise. And you did die. Through this formidable challenge, you emerged as a renewed individual, prepared to embrace your future.
Now, Elijah, it is time to revel in your first reward. Take note of the silence and tranquility that surrounds you. Allow yourself to bask in it. Remember not to anticipate what lies ahead. Accept your gift."
"I feel an overwhelming sense of peace. It truly mirrors the visualization. Everything has become so serene, and I am privileged to witness the beauty of life," Elijah expressed.
"Indeed, what you have just described is precisely why we have been revisiting this visualization repeatedly. You were learning through each repetition, not merely on an intellectual level," the Professor explained.
"Savor this moment for as long as you need."
"Now, I am starting to experience bliss and euphoria surfacing within me," Elijah shared.
“It’s as if my body is being filled. As if I had been wearing clothes too big for me, and now they fit perfectly. It's an incredible sensation!"
"Yes, relish in that sensation as well," the Professor encouraged.
Overwhelmed, Elijah began to cry. "I would have never expected something so terrifying to be so pleasurable. I am overflowing with gratitude for the ability to feel this good."
"Life is indeed this beautiful, Elijah. And you are this beautiful," the Professor lovingly emphasized.
Tears continued to stream down Elijah's face. The two of them sat together, immersed in this moment of openness, presence, and joy. The world seemed to stand still as time dissolved. A newfound light filled the room.
"It feels as though there is nothing left to do, Doc. The decision has become inconsequential," Elijah remarked.
"Yes, we often approach decisions with linear and rational thinking, but life always holds us in its grasp. We are part of something much grander. Once we surrender ourselves to the unfolding events, the decision becomes obvious, and we wonder what all the fuss was about," the Professor explained.
"That's exactly how I feel, Doc. I put so much time into vacillating and agonizing, only to end up in the same place. I was paralyzed, Doc. I suppose it was all part of the process, though."
"That's true! There's nothing wrong with feeling a bit frozen, but sometimes we desire something different," the Professor replied, and they both shared a laugh. Elijah let out a sigh of relief, his face now noticeably brighter. His body relaxed, sinking back into the couch.
"Nothing to do, nowhere to go, Doc."
"You've got it, Elijah. That's your fourth reward."
P.S. If you enjoy my writing and want to support me further, I’m raising money to support writing my first book. Check the link below for more details.